SUSAN FAUCON: Music

• MP3 play whole song, hi-fi (broadband)

Drug addiction and self abuse taken to the point of suicide.

Waking up alone and tired from the night before
Everything’s a mess us usual barricade the door
My head it aches, Oh God what did I do
No, not again the passed is seeping through

Drag myself up out of bed, gotta try and start the groove
My feet hit the floor then I realize the truth
I got nowhere to go, no job, no friends, no family
What’s become of me?

I just want a little hope to move forward
to move backward
to just pack it up and get away
I just want a little hope for the good of you
for the good of me
for the whole of humanity

I struggle out of bed and stumble on the night before
The only hope is sedation, cannot handle anymore
The pain is so intense can bare to breathe another breath
Gotta find the sweet escape or grab the hand of death

I fill my mouth with anything to kill the fear that grabs my soul
Vodka, pills and sugar and a lover young or old
Swallow hard and wait a bit, that’s the feeling that I crave
It hits my blood, then I start to glow before the lights go out again

I just want a little hope to move forward
to move backward
to just pack it up and get away
I just want a little hope for the good of you
for the good of me
for the whole of humanity

The day is gone it’s all a blur, just waking up again
Can’t face another minute here gotta find a way to end
This whole mess they call it life too much for me to bare
A decision’s all I have to make, that’s it, I’m there

I reach inside the bedside table, find the answer there
I fill the chamber with the bullet, place it firmly here
I ask God for the courage please, let me pull it strong
I close my eyes and take a breath (breath)

Heartbeat

I can’t do it, no I can’t do it not this time
I can’t do it, no got too much on the line

Now what am I to do oh God you tell me
How am I supposed to face this thing called life
It’s so much effort, so relentless
God just help me please, I beg you please